Tuesday, October 28, 2014

She believes!

She believes in magic
The magic of people and their words
Their smiles and dreams
Of the starry nights and the shooting stars
The ocean and the sand touching her feet
The snow-capped peaks and the valleys with creeks
The spring buds and the blooming tulips
The fall colors and the radiant sunshine of winters
And the hope in her heart
She knows it is okay to believe in magic!

Saturday, December 29, 2012

It could have been me!

"Meri zindagi ko raundh kar agar woh sab zinda hain toh yeh iss desh ki har aurat ka balaatkaar hua..."

I don't think we, as a nation, have ever been slapped so hard on the face. My soul has been raped today, and these scars will never fade. I feel sick to my stomach and there is no cure. I am helpless and ashamed, and don't know if there is a way to channelize this anger to make things better in any way.

I know this ain't the only case in India, and hundreds of women are raped and murdered on monthly basis. 90% of cases don't get any media attention and therefore, remain under covers. The ones that come out in open are often forgotten over time due to lack of speedy trial or absence of societal support.

Today, I write this not as the so-called socially conscious literate strata of the country, but as a woman who is still somewhere proud to be an Indian, and all she asks for in return for this love is the rightful, dignified life in any part of India. 

I have been fortunate enough to travel the world and interact with men and women of other countries, cultures, religions, nationalities, and classes of societies. The major difference between our “third world” and “developing” country and the West is not the scientific advancements or progressive mindset of people, but the lack of basic respect and right to live a dignified life for half of our population. Irony is that men of our nation pray to deities and goddesses, but disrespect and harass women around them. Our conscience is dead and until this prevails, there is only one direction we are headed to – doom.

And God? Is there any? The basic premise of religion is that no evil happens to people who are good to others. Then how do we explain all the crime against women...girl children are not spared even in the womb. It can’t be all Karma, right? There are unanswered questions and broken thoughts that would never find answers, and I don’t think I even want to try now.

I couldn’t control my tears today, and I know I will too, eventually, forget this incident. But with Amanat’s death, a part of me has died too, and I know it can never be revived! 

Wednesday, August 01, 2012

How do "I DO"?

I have heard good things about you, from not one but many. You are known to bring sweet surprises to the people who trust in you. My mom loves you, and my family can't stop bragging about their adulation for you. You always come to rescue to people who are looking for their share of happiness, and you haven't messed up as much as your counterparts, so you do have a history of success. You provide options and help people pick the best for them.

So how come I just cannot bring myself to open up to you. I have tried convincing myself but it hasn’t worked…petrifying myself with the plausible hitches that my life could face for not even trying to explore you, but of no use. Is it just me who doesn't get it? I think I have no hope!

Arranged Marriage, I dread you, like seriously! Will we ever become friends?

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

A Grown-Up Child

He is a dreamer and teaser
A dancer and a dapper
Happy lucky goer
With stupid sense of humor…

He loves to show-off
Strong yet soft
Exclusively entertaining
With stories fascinating…

He is the new drama queen
Competing our Bollywood king
Funny and mean
Almost a kid with a grin…

He is irritatingly naughty
A spoilt Marathi
Who converted a tired evening
To a fun weekend before leaving!

P.S.: Dedicated to the this llil boy who made us laugh so much over the weekend. 

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

The year that was...
…of new promises and of positive beginnings
…of some unfulfilled dreams and of some harsh realities
…of broken hearts and of unwarranted wishes
…of new experiences and of old reunions
…of finding the child within and of simultaneously growing mature
…of novel teachings and of breaking fallacies
…of falling tears and of getting stronger
…of introspections and of finding answers from others
…of reinforcing old beliefs and of learning to unlearn
…of getting lost in the crowd and of discovering self in solitude
…of ignoring others and of getting ignored
…of cheerful songs and fancy moves, and of sad heartbroken tunes
…of getting drunk and losing myself, and then reflecting on it some more
…of losing friends and of gaining sanity
…of ‘hating it all’ and of achieving the wisdom of loving myself
…of weak moments and then coming out stronger
…of darkness and depression, and of gleam of sunshine
…of letting it go and of hopes for a happier tomorrow

Dedicated to everyone I met, left behind, and reunited with; to 2011 that went by!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Hyderabad Talkies Part II

These moments...are these accidents, or were they written like these only? Were they decided already, somewhere, sometime, by someone? Or were they not decided, and all that is happening was unplanned, unthought of?

I meet the one's who are mine, and who are strangers..I like a few, and I dont like a few. I move ahead, and leave some behind. Relations have been identified, or atleast the mantra. This is my world and everything has a bit of me..a little more, a little less.

The journey is long and destination unclear. This life is a mirage; we experience, we learn, and we grow. Why do we break apart when we were never together?

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

I don't like this Idea Naresh!

I know you had planned your future well. After becoming an engineer from an esteem college, you completed MBA in Marketing from your dream college. You were enjoying your job, and loved the fact that you had to work from Mumbai, where you have loads of friends to hang around with. You were a pakka Hyderabadi and I could see that in your nawaabi - ‘I-just-like-to-have-fun’ and ‘I-give-a-damn’ - attitude.
A week ago, your FB update said that you bought a car, which you were bringing to great use by exploring all the weekend getaways near Mumbai. I know you worshipped Sachin, and wished him birthday on FB last night. You have no idea how jealous I was when I saw your picture celebrating MI’s victory at Wankhade on Friday…I so really want to see God live in action myself. And yes, you loved Katrina as much as you did Rajani. You were instrumental in making ‘Sheila ki Jawaani’ such a major hit that it is now, by promoting it on your FB wall for days and months. And I can bet that everything I know about Idea 3G is via your wall.
Now how do I tell myself that everything will stop from today? One fine morning and you decide to leave everything behind? One trek and you are not interested in the worldly pleasures anymore? Just when people are accustomed to seeing you all over their walls, you settle down on leaving everything behind just like that, and slip under covers? Who will support me when I would want to win an argument against Prasoon? Who will comment on my weekend hungama pictures with all that enthusiasm? Who will call me to Mumbai to celebrate MI’s win in the IPL. I will no more have any Idea in my life. I will not know the latest updates about Rajani or Katrina through your newsletter-wall. Will I really not have any updates on my page from you?
I know we had never met in person, not even have we spoken on the phone, but we have been friends for long - as much as 6 years? You have been one of the most special online friends in my not-so-virtual world, and now your absence is bringing tears in my eyes. Life doesn’t come with a warranty card, and you are asking me to not take it for granted anymore.
All I want to know if life worth all this effort? Really? We run around all the time, through school, college, graduation, jobs, relationships, parents, friends, etc. etc, and what we get in the end is what we never want. You should know that you have lived a good life and your parents are proud of you. You shall be missed – terribly – by all your real and virtual friends, and all the people who have known you. May you rest in peace, now and always!

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Don't know why...

I thought I am strong
So overconfident, could never go wrong…
There’ll be a time, when I am forced to think
This controlled life could go out of sync…

I can never bring myself to ask if u r still there
I am not sure if u will be here…
Oh I don’t know what I feel
I would never know if it is the right thing to kneel….

I know I lost my chance
But does life give you another glance…
Do you think it’s the right thing to try
Or should I just say good bye…

I hate seeing myself regret
Trust me, it’s not easy to forget…
Living life on my own terms
Is it insane, I just need to confirm…

Would you ever understand
I probably need you to try again…
Hopefully, there is a future for us both
Together if we may take that oath… … …

P.S: Randomness inspired; no personal story behind this post!

Monday, October 18, 2010

Words, words are all I have...

Space is less but I want to say more
Whatever is written is from the core
Let me be in, open your back door
Or let’s meet up at the sea shore
Two of us are better than four
How about a date se┼łor?

Saturday, July 03, 2010


Cut all the threads from the past
No longer that make sense to last
Look forward to a new sunrise
Will make me happy and wise

Now I seem to know this all
But still in the past I fall
The more I move, less I forget
All corners point at one edge

The rainbow I saw today
Like a smile on the clear blue sky
My lifes missing a few of those shades
Whom do I ask why

I run after a new beginning
But the shadows still follow
The race seems unending
Are the dues still pending

Wish I knew where am going
The boulevard I need to close in
I knw the horizon is sumwhr distant
But I can reach if you help me start

Let us make a life worth living
With no regrets or unsure dreams
Tomorrow is an upshot of our past
So why to cut the threads that don’t last!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Couldn't have put myself in better words...

I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need em again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night

I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end

There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation

Friday, January 08, 2010


I am happy today. Randomly came across an old school mate's wedding pics...this guy was a year senior in school and has tied knots to a gal one year junior to me...both of them looked really happy with each other...I just felt so nice after looking at their smiling faces...I wonder why I look for happiness everywhere on earth when its just right beside me; all I need to do is to extend my hand and grab it.

Thanks FB!
Happy Budday To You!

Heres the story of the little boy
Whose class was just down the street
He looked those intellectual sorts
Could you have termed him a geek?
He walked with an attitude
And confidence was his ‘middle’ name
The only things he aspired for
Were money, happiness, and fame…

Years went past by
And the seasons brought about a transition
What he is like now
I’ll bring to your attention
When life is in such short supplies
He has chosen the path of unprecedented volatility
To confront the fear and seek the honor
Is within the reach of his ability…

As he gears up
To color the fresh page on this threshold
He sees his wonderful 25 years in retrospect
With an innocent smile on hold
While thanking for the blessed life he’s lived until now
He looks forward to the next chapter
Let’s see it unfolds how…

He’s embarked on the search of what he truly wants in life
But this magnificent time comes with a price
The days are long and sleepless are the nights
The dreams sometimes are in for a pleasant surprise
His tales of bravery are yet to be told
And I am going to be a witness as they unfold…

Wishing him love, luck, and lots of respect
May he lives till the end of the millennium
And succeeds on every endeavor the country expects…

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Santa is around...

It’s been really really long since I have got a gift for Christmas and honestly I don’t even expect one…and today when a friend in office asked what I want for Christmas, I, for a while, didn’t know what to ask for.

My memories for ‘Christmas Presents’ date ages back when my sis n I were quite young. Papa used to get a lot of chocolates, toffees, britannia sponge cakes, jelly cubes, mango frooties, etc. for us on the Christmas Eve and keep them at our bed side when we had gone off to deep sleep. Both of us always knew that he was our Santa and we never had to hang red socks or decorate a Christmas tree to lure him to surprise us.
After the tradition continued for some years, we couldn’t wait till the morning to lay our hands on the goodies. One of the years, I remember, I couldn't sleep and half way through the night (till early morning hours) got up every half an hour to check if papa has placed the goodies or not. Obviously, he did, before the sun showed his face.

This was buried in my head long since and am thankful to this friend who brought back the cozy, sweet reminiscences back to the surface...

Merry Christmas to everyone! Hope all of you get a lot of gifts and "time" from your loved ones...

Monday, October 26, 2009

All 'Rattle n Hum' inside my head!

Quite confounding but it is the sadistic truth about life…when you least expect things, you just see them surfacing to life from the most barren of the lands. Expectations kill the excitement and why wouldn’t they; we are not being taught to be patient as humans. We have to anticipate a reward for every little thing we do…remember when you were promised a bicycle for getting a distinction in class 10? And who has seen this life…our future is all woven by our dreams and expectations from our loved ones around. Ever wondered if we can ever revolutionize the way we think and wait to discover what is in store for us.

I also fail to understand that why are we expected to behave in a meticulously conventional way to get our share of space in this society; why would be tagged as rebels if we try to break the shackles of this orthodox and narcissistic society. The society takes the most toll on the ones who follow its norms. Haven’t you seen the most humane and benevolent of the people suffering in this thankless world, as a rule?

We need to be reminded that at the end of the day, no one is responsible for our happiness, but we. And who is going to decide what is wrong or right for us…isn’t it all prejudged by all our own conscience ultimately? Whatever is right for me might just be the most awful thing for you. Who has the bloody authority to take a call on it – you, society, religion, your parents – who?

Guess, I need to take a break and get a drink!

Monday, October 12, 2009

Lend credence to my experience :)

- If I wish to fly, I will; the only thing that can stop me is me!

- You meet all kinds of people, but the ones who have the same basic grain as u, become your friends.

- God loves you more than you think.

- Everything falls into place at the end of the day; everyday is an experience!

- Reading books can keep you off the stray thoughts that linger around aimlessly.

- When you don't feel like doing/saying something, don't do/say it; there is a mood and time for everything.

- People love us for what we are; we forget that if we change for them, they'll stop loving us.

- The only person who loves us more than anyone else in the world is our mom.

- Kids are the best thing God gave us. Love them; all of them!

- We have one life, make the most of it. I dont want to die of any regret...am working on this one!

- Our values and beliefs change with time and age. I have done so many things in life, which were 'not right' for me at some point of time.

- Accept yourself for what you are; don't be too tough on yourself, you too are a human.

- Don't give alibis to conceal your mistakes. Accept them with your head on the shoulders. Stand for your mistakes.

- Love as much as you can, fall for infactuations, have a lot of crushes. Even if you end up in a mess, you'll remember the exciting (good or bad) times through your life and as a bonus, tips on what 'not-to-do' with the next guy/gal.

- Get a taste of everything during this lifetime.

- Trust people around. Helps building relationships!

- Sometimes, saas-bahu soaps are fun; just don't watch them with your mom around...you won't be able to make fun of them.

- Give your 100% to every relationship. What goes around, definitely comes around!

- Build up your endurance power. Eat good food, exercise regularly, and think positive. 20 yrs down the line, you will regret not doing this.

- Everyone deserves a second chance the way you do. Forgive people. Forget your mistakes, not the lessons learned.

- Travel. Enrich yourself with your country's history. More than the bank balance, you'll cherish the times you spent taking a stroll on the countryside and trying to understand an alien language.

- Sing. Dance. No matter how bad you are at it. Use music to heal yourself, it will fill you with vigor.

- You have half chances, so does everybody else. Believe in yourself!

Monday, June 29, 2009

My love conversations

p: hey sexy lady
get on the floor
waise profile pic me is foto ke badle tattooed pic lagana banta ahi
me: saath chal
p: this is the homely u
me: hahha
is this?
p: misleading!
me: homely kahan?
p: isnt it a kitchen?
me: abey nahi
p: then what?
me: disco theque hai
the DJ podium
p: oh....i saw new york yesterday achi thi :)
me: woh badi pic mein visible hai
maine bhi dkehi
p: hmm
me: john is sooooooo yummilicious
p: liked it?
yeah well he is now im kinda confused who is sexier
john abraham or farhan akhtar!
me: hehhe
sey toh john hi hai
farhan is multi talented
p: :)
me: main ab shahid aur john mein confused hoon
ki kisse shaadi akrun
p: hahaha
shahid kapur is cute looking and all!
but sexy?
sorry no chance!
me: i knowww
he isnt sexy
hes extremely cute
but john is like ohhh la lala
p: heheh :D
me: achcha sun ... kuch batana tha
p: ?
me: something imp
and keep it to urself
p: bata na janman
tere intezar me baithe hai
me: heheh
toh baat yeh hai ki
I love U
ab ja
p: hahaha
ure soooooooooooooooo predictable gorgeous!
me: heheh
p: i was waiting for that to come
me: :P
i know
p: apne liye pyar maine teri chat room wali
ankhon me dekh lia tha!
me: hahahha
u knw me so well
ab bhaag honey
p: bye babes! loads of love
me: miss u so much
p: :)
me: me tooo...three...fourrr

P.S.: I love such chit chats. We both love each other but we love John and Shahid too; and we are ready to share them, if they don't mind :D.
BTW, 'p' is none other than madame Prachi and yes, we aren't two lesbos, even though our college was kinda famous for it. After all, LSR can also be expanded as 'Lesbian Society Rules' :P .

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

The blogpost dedicated to me :D


And let me clarify...not everything written there is true...especially the "cooked up" love story never existed! Thats Pracs, by the way!

Tuesday, March 31, 2009


Take it or leave is wat they say...but if I dont want to do either...then???

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Our Vaishno Devi Trip :)

Pracs has beautifully described our so very awaited Vaishno Devi trip in her blog...needless to say, with all the masala and mirch which were and were not a part of it :D.

This is how she goes:

For your convenience and mine…let me divide this post into two parts (Professional hazard of over three years of organizing content into logical chunks!) The first part is the Sequence of Events that Precede the Trip and the second part is well, The Trip itself. I thought I’d add another part devoted to Ms Malik, my companion…but I am sure that after reading this post, you will realize that madam definitely merits a whole post to herself! :D

For more, go to her blog and anjoy urself :)

Friday, February 13, 2009

Love is in the Air...

Red roses...heart-shaped balloons...rum chocolates...pink ribbons...teddy bears...cute little cupids...beautiful cards...romantic tracks... diamonds...kisses...hugs...wow...it seems the entire air is singing love songs :))
So this post is dedicated to all of them!

I like some people and I don't like some. I love some and I do not love some (not love is not hate). Its my choice afterall! Not that the story began by not liking them but it took that turn eventually and some poeple asked for it.

Rightnow, I can think of 1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8.. of such people and the count is definitely more (..@..#..$..%..uff my memory). But sometimes, I honestly wonder, if I could be friends with them? Would things have been different...pleasantly? Afterall, life is too short to 'not like' anyone!

They say that we all are same just a different name
But then why don't I like you and you feel the same
You have friends who adore you
I have my share and they value me too
Some people speak great deal of you
Then why don't I see the same picture of you
You must be nice and great for your friends
Why haven't I seen similar trends
I don’t miss you but I think I miss not knowing you
And when your thought crosses my mind
I wonder if we would smile when we meet one more time

I guess you are not born to be friends with everyone in this world :-(

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Direct from heart...

I haven't written it; so won't take any credit. Found it online and seemed like someone read me and wrote this :))...

I’m not a perfect girl... my hair doesn’t
always stay in place, and I spill a lot of
things. I’m pretty clumsy and sometimes
I have a broken heart.
my friends & I
sometimes fight and maybe some days
nothing goes right but when I think about
it and take a step back, I remember how
(amazing) life truly is and that maybe...
just maybe, I like being UNPERFECT!

I’m not the girl who runs up to you when
I see you & am not the girl who jumps at
every moment to talk to you; 'but I am the
girl who keeps it all inside'& regrets it
later. You still give me butterflies…

In my opinion... one of the worst feelings
in the world is wondering how things
could have - would have - should have been.

You will never know how it feels to have the one person
who means everything to you, makes you feel that you're nothing

She's not like most girls her age…
you'd think it would be her routine by now -
you'd think she wouldn't let it get to her -
but the truth is …
you're the only one who can break her now.

It’s like; we’re more than friends;
but less than lovers.

There’s no use stressing over something in the past, because there’s not a damn thing you can do to change it.At some point you have to realize he doesn’t care & you could be missing out on someone who does. Anyone can be passionate...but only real lovers can be silly. Everybody winds up kissing the wrong person goodnight.

Thursday, October 09, 2008


The credit for this post goes entirely to Pri (http://lifeofpri.blogspot.com/), my blog friend, whose latest post inspired me to come up with this one. Her lovely post has revived quite a lot of my pleasant memories. I loved the idea of revisiting them today......

- I still remember the days when during my summer vacations, I used to visit Nani's place and she used to apply henna on my feet every single morning while I was asleep, to ensure that my skin remains cool and I dont suffer from skin allergies. And me being me, used to cry every single time and complain about it. Now I miss that pampering.

-Where are the days when I used to play Ghar-Ghar with my colony friends during the summer holidays in the staircase or the bulding corridors. The days when I used to be really happy making the Parle G biscuits as the menu for my doll's wedding.

- I want to eat the Aloo Parathas and Shakkar Paras that my Nani used to make especially for me.

- I treasure the school days when we used to get the annual results, hoping and knowing that I would get the top rank and be called upon the stage.

- The days back when my dad used to come back from office with toffees without fail and how we used to rush down to help him carry stuff. Sometimes we used to pretend that we are sleeping when he arrives and then the whole process of he waking us up and we pranking on him used to start.

- I wish I could see my Mom asking Rs 20 everyday from dad for her auto fare even now.

- Miss those days when mom used to lock us in the house during the day, while she was away for work and how I and my sis used to get scared each time the bell rang. We were given Rs 10 a day for staying alone at home and not at the creche.

- Now I laugh when I think of the days when my school bus used to take me back to school without dropping at the pick up stop in the absence of anyone from the creche. My teachers used to love watching me cry and telling me that I will be eaten by a mouse.

- The day when I asked my dad to buy us Maggi for the first time, which was for Rs 5 per pack, is still fresh in my mind.

I read this somewhere and fits perfectly with what I am feeling right now.

"The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends.I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death! Wats that, a bonus??

The life cycle is all backwards.You should die first and get it out of the way. Then you go live in an old age home. When you get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension. Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your 'retirement'. You drink alcohol, party and get ready for High School. You go to primary school, become a kid; you play with no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back and spend your last 9 months floating with luxuries like central heating, spa, room service on tap. And then finally you finish off as an orgasm!!"

I sincerely wish I could press the 'Rewind' button and live all those times again!

Monday, August 11, 2008


"One year one month and one day" he said and reminded me of this and I wondered how could I not remember...

Exactly an year a month and a day before, Rajiv and I were generally chit chatting on the phone...I had recently moved to Hyderabad and into this PG from the company guest house and needless to say, was missing dilli terribly. And then suddenly the uniqueness of the date (07-07-07) struck us and we decided to remember this day forever for years to come...and to meet or atleast talk to each other on 10-10-10. Nothing special except for the mysterious sounding dates...

One of the thought that went behind this deal was the natural course of our lives to get lost in this rat race of earning a living and achieving our goals and along the way leaving some friends behind...['Tanha dil tanha safar, dhoonde tujhe phir kyu nazar...' by Shaan in the background :D]...
We meet different people everyday, network around, make new contacts...and in this process some become friends...stay with us for more time than we actually thought of and then a few disappear along the journey...so we thought that this triple date funda was reasonably a good way of keeping a track of each other's life and be friends forever.

Now the ironical part...in this one year one month and one day, his life has quite a no. of updates; from changing job to shifting to a new house, to getting a girl friend to searching a wife...and here I am...with absolutely no change...zero...zilch updates, news, or views...its all the same...its the same me, my life, my thoughts, my job, my company, my city, my PG, my friends, my life...isn't this called the height of 'monotonous living'...

And its high time to make a promise to myself...come 09-09-09 and I will be have a changed life...not that its not good right now...but for better...no clue of 'what' and 'how' part of the entire scenario but it will...

So heres me, presenting my mantra for 2008-09...
"Break the monotony. Do something strange and extravagant."